Getting Things Right

It only took forty years, but finally, Major League Baseball got it right.

Sure, they’ve have been around since the 60’s – and athletes have been serial abusers since then - but today you gotta hand it to MLB after announcing seriously stiff penalties for steroid use.

Hey. Sometimes it takes 40 plus years to wake up and smell the laced coffee.
The agreement calls for a 50-game suspension for a first-time steroid offence, 100 games for a second-time offence and a lifetime ban for third-time offenders.

Ya, that’s a “Three-strikes-and-your-out” policy. Considering it’s baseball, wonder why they couldn’t have thought of that one before?

My major concern is – they might be going too far with this anti-drug craze. The plan also provides testing for amphetamines.

You thought the games were long before! Those were played when the guys were on speed!
So – why the sudden change? It took a seriously cowed players union to surrender to these new rules. After Rafael Palmeiro was caught, apparently perjuring himself before Congress – a federal crime – no one who plays between the lines were willing to step over the line and say, “You’re going too far.”

It’s all about the Congress. You know, the guys and gals in Washington who get things done so prudently and effectively the world is a better place because of them? No? Never heard of them doing that?

That’s because on this case Congress could do to baseball what it likes because they came to the table with a heavy bat. The game's anti-trust exemption makes it especially susceptible to political pressure.

Congress loves to use political pressure – and this time they swung for the fences – and got almost all they wanted.

Now the fans will get what they wanted, a clean game, played over seemingly endless hours, full of wee little punch and judy hitters.

Instead of the long ball, will chicks dig the seeing-eye single or the blooper to center? Baseball sure hopes so.

They’ve cleaned up their act. Is there anyone else out there in the world of sports that needs our attention?

How about NASCAR…
Defending Nextel Cup Champion Kurt Busch came up a few cans more than a six-pack during an intoxication test last week. He was charged with reckless driving after being clocked going 60 miles per hour in a 45-mph zone and attempting to flee from the police by running a stop sign and making erratic lane changes.Not to make light of a DUI charge, but isn’t this further proof that all NASCAR drivers can do well is turn left? When F-1’s Juan Pablo Montoya was caught speeding, he was going 100-mph over the speed limit and the police arrested him after he got home ‘cause they couldn’t catch him.

It’s a sad state of affairs when the defending racing series champ is busted going 15-mph over the limit. OK, so he was drinking but the premise is just embarrassing.
However, not as embarrassing as this: NASCAR and Harlequin have teamed for a series of romance novels with a stock-car theme. The first one, In the Groove, is to be released in January to coincide with the Daytona 500. Insert your “NASCAR fans can read?” joke here.

Then there’s tennis…
At this week’s Tennis Masters tournament, the $4.45-million season-ender that assembles the world's eight best players, half the top guys either took their appearance money and went home claiming injury – or they didn’t even bother to show up in the first place. Roger Federer, who was almost a lock to win anyway, was the only top-five player left. Nothing says “tennis” better these days than almost complete indifference. But this time it’s from the players?Surely that would never happen in the women’s game right? Well, Venus Williams says winning her third Wimbledon title was exciting - but it wasn't the best thing that happened this year.
What was you ask?

No. 1 was attending a 1980s-themed prom. ''Seriously, it was the best time of my life,'' she said. “I had lace gloves. I was so '80s it was ridiculous; I was disgusted with myself.'' Neither Venus nor her sister Serena attended public high school you see, so Serena threw a party with a high school theme – for herself.

So – let’s recap: Winning Wimbledon lost out to a Madonna dress up party.
I score that as: Men 15 – Women Love

How about broadcasting?

ESPN was criticized from all quarters for its “All-Terrell Owens, All-the-time” coverage so Fox NFL Sunday, after quick look at the clown, took the brave stance of dropping the subject. Host James Brown said: "OK, folks, I promise. No more T.O. talk the rest of the show." That lasted for about 10 minutes when Frank Caliendo went totally TO for his silly bit.
You can always count on Fox can’t you? Earlier this week, that class-act network announced they will show fans running onto the playing field during games.

Fox boss David Hill said that his network has changed its policy and will allow cameras to broadcast intrusions live.Why? Because, they say, viewers deserve to understand why there's been an interruption in a game. Like we couldn’t figure that out? The reason broadcasters stopped showing these clowns was to stop them from having their 15-minutes of fame.
Now? Get ready everyone. It’s gonna be all-yahoo TV on Fox. And that’s not just in the broadcast booth.

When one thing gets fixed in sports, there always seems to be plenty more fill to its place to outrage us fans.

Yet we remain fans. Does that make us masochists?

Well, in the words of the Los Angeles Lakers Kobe Bryant, after getting booed mercilessly by the fans in Philly:

“I love it. I love it. I love it. I mean, I love it.”